Friday, February 5, 2016

Day 78 - Friday, February 5, 2016

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"Standing alone doesn't mean I am alone, it means I'm strong enough to handle things all by myself."
-Unknown

I forgot to mention a few things that I noticed and that took place yesterday. One of the major things that happened was a sort of enlightenment period. If you have been keeping up with my posts you would have remembered when I wrote about friends losing interest in my condition and keeping in touch with me. You would also remember the only male friend of mine that I disclosed my status to almost immediately after I was diagnosed. Let's call him "Kevin."

So, after I revealed to Kevin that I contracted this disease, he revealed to me that he had a crush on me. Then vowed to be by my side throughout this entire ordeal to my healing. Well, that couldn't be further from the truth. The only time I hear from him is when he is going through problems with his girlfriend, which is every other week.

He reads my blogs from time to time and may call every blue moon to say hey. But as far as being there for me, it has NEVER happened. He's never been to my house. He doesn't know where I live. He has never accompanied me to any of my doctor visits. He's never brought me anything to eat. He's never sat by my bed when I was seriously sick and thought I could die. He's never really done anything to show any sort of concern.

Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't have expected him to do so if it wasn't for the fact that he promised these things to my brothers and I. Biggest lie ever told to man!!! This is why I mentioned this. He called me yesterday from a phone number other than his, and I don't like to answer unknown numbers. I guess his girlfriend kicked him out again. He knew I was going to the doctor for the first time and I was going to receive my lab results. But he cared nothing about discussing that. He just got to the point that he was going to come see me.

This was my face:

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I see right through that foolishness. It was almost after eight o'clock at night. You weren't coming to see me. You wanted a place to lay your head for the night. I just said okay and hung my phone up without giving a second thought. My house is in shambles because I've been too depressed to clean up. I wasn't interested in having company. Much less company who does not care about my well-being. Later in the evening, I noticed that I had a missed call from the same number he called from earlier and a text message saying it was him. I didn't bother calling him back. I'm the one who needs help and can't find it any damn where. I'm not playing games and extending myself to anyone else. Especially someone so selfish and inconsiderate as I was beginning to realize he is. This also mad me realize how he mentions when he doesn't have enough money to pay his phone bill as if he's trying to throw a hint for me to do it. He is out of his fucking mind! I believe in partnerships. I am not a paymaster. I will help out someone I am dating because we are partners and most likely they are helping me out. But as far as some random, wishy-washy friend who gives his girlfriend all of his money regardless of how she treats him. Then he expects me to tie up the loose ends. No sir! I love myself too much to be a fool.

Basically, I'm beginning to resent him and starting not to see him as a friend anymore. How could he be so inconsiderate? Yet, every time something goes wrong with his girlfriend he bashes the entire race of black women as a whole. That includes me.

Also, my other friend is working again and she has three children to take care of. We don't talk as much as we used to but I don't hold it against her. Because in the beginning she was really adamant about being involved in my life, going with me any and everywhere I needed to go, keeping my spirits up and just overall being a good friend. But I was pushing her off. I wanted her to focus on her children and not my misery. So now that she is doing that, I am extremely happy for her. She is still a great and loving friend in my book. If she ever needed anything I would be there for her, no questions asked.

I miss Mr. Scholar already. But this too shall pass.

I also forgot to mention the copay for my doctor's visit yesterday. Every time I see a specialist I have to pay a $40 copay. This can add up over the next two months as long as I juggle two doctors. But I am going to do so for as long as I can afford. I also don't plan on telling the other doctor about the lab results from yesterday's doctor so that they will order new ones. I'm not going to lie. I'm a little nervous about that as well. Good things rarely happen for me. What if this test was a fluke and the next set of blood work I receive yields poor results, lower than the news I just obtained? What if the improvement was a hoax? Oh well. I'll find out head on.

I also forgot to mention the fact that I record almost every appointment I have had thus far. I asked the doctor what role does mucus play in this disease. Although he has been in this field for 24 years, he seemed noticeably dumbfounded and he blurted out an answer I don't even think he had committed to 100%. He said, "absolutely none. Mucus has nothing to do with disease." 

I was like...

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He obviously was not knowledgeable in that department, but I let it slide for the time being. Once my appointment was over, I had about 15 minutes before I had to pick my son up from school. I told him the good news and decided not to return to work for the rest of the day.

It's cold today, so I have been researching recipes for chickpea soup. I'm going to try some today when I get off of work. I'll let you guys know how it turns out. I would really like to put some smoked turkey in it just for the flavoring but I will find an alkaline alternative.

Time
Dr. Sebi Product
Dosage
Form
9:00 AM
Bio Ferro
3 capsules in the A.M. & P.M.
Capsules
9:00 AM
Bromide Plus
4 capsules daily
Capsules
9:00 AM
Chelation 2
2 capsules in the A.M. & P.M.
Capsules
9:00 AM
Estro
4 capsules daily
Capsules
9:00 AM
Fucus
2 capsules in the A.M. & P.M.
Capsules
9:00 AM
Green Food
4 capsules daily
Capsules
9:00 AM
Lupulo
Add ½ tsp. in one ounce of water, take 3 times daily.
Tonic
9:00 AM
Lymphalin
3 capsules in the A.M. & P.M.
Capsules
9:00 AM
Viento
4 capsules daily
Capsules

To be continued...


Time
Dr. Sebi Product
Dosage
Form
10:00 PM
Bio Ferro
3 capsules in the A.M. & P.M.
Capsules
10:00 PM
Lily of the Valley
Pour 1 cup of boiling water to 1/8 tsp of powder, let cool and drink.
Powder
10:00 PM
Chelation 2
2 capsules in the A.M. & P.M.
Capsules
10:00 PM
Fucus
2 capsules in the A.M. & P.M.
Capsules
10:00 PM
Lupulo
Add ½ tsp. in one ounce of water, take 3 times daily.
Tonic
10:00 PM
Lymphalin
3 capsules in the A.M. & P.M.
Capsules

Woo! I am throwing my head back and laughing so hard right now! The power of the third eye is no joke people. Especially when you follow a vegan lifestyle. Remember when I said I had to pull back from Mr. Scholar? Aw man! I can't stop laughing. This is how I know I am getting stronger as an individual. Wait until you hear what I have to tell you.

Okay, so as I told you before, Mr. Scholar and I are connected online. His ex-wife is also connected to the both of us online as well. So he called me to check up on me while I was in the grocery store yesterday. About 40 minutes into the conversation he began telling me how stressed out he is because his ex refuses to let him move on peacefully and be happy. When it comes to emotions, I never takes sides other than that of truth. He told me she is trying to ruin his life and have him thrown out of his tribe. That sounds like something Anthony said about me after I found out he was gay. Mr. Scholar told me that she is spreading rumors and sending messages to all of the tribesmen about him because she sees that he really likes me. Also something that Anthony said. But wait, that is not the kicker. Let me go on.

He said he wanted to cry. Keep in mind that I have never seen this man in person or been to his state ever in my life but he was the one going around telling everyone how into me he is. So 45 minutes into our conversation, he began to almost hyperventilate. He began telling me that she posted something about him. Then he began to read the entire post to me.

Let me just stop there. We are going to have a brief intermission to allow everyone enough time to go get their popcorn. Hurry back. I will be right here waiting.

Okay, so basically, she said on a public platform that Mr. Scholar was her pimp and she was his hoe. That is how they met. She later said that she became pregnant and he was happy but he didn't know if it was his and because of that he tortured her for her entire pregnancy. She also stated that he used to put her in chokeholds and punch her in the ribs and that she was afraid of him. Until one day she began fighting back. She said she was raped and looking for him to protect her and he was nowhere to be found. He left her for dead. She said she was supposed to be his queen but was never treated like it and now he is moving on with me.

I can't make this stuff up people. As he read this, all I could say is wow! I was right. He is a woman beater, although he has displayed no signs. My third eye is definitely in tune. That is two for two so far. I even told him about the fact that I had just written two days ago that he may be a woman beater. First he said it isn't true. Then he said she is exaggerating. Either way it went, I didn't give a damn. I was just glad that I followed my instincts and pulled myself out of the loop before it got too deep.

I explained to him that she is hurt and she's going to do whatever it takes to make her feel better. I said she has legitimate reasons to be hurt regardless of how she deals with the pain. I tried to reassure him as well but I wanted him to understand both sides of the situation. He became emotional and started telling me how much he loves me because I make him feel better, I don't lie, I don't sugarcoat and that I am a ball of love.

If only he knew, I am like that with everyone. He is not special. Once he felt better, I got of the phone with him and thanked my lucky stars for all the gifts and foresight that has been bestowed upon me. All I could do was smile. I dodged a serious bullet because I'm sure I would have been in jail messing with him. If he would have even blew in my direction I would have beaten his ass to a pulp. I could never be anyone's hoe. Nor could I just stand there and let a man beat on me without any repercussion. I felt like I was reading one of Sistah Souljah's novels with all of the drama that I was hearing. Whew!

Anyway, I just wanted to share that with you. The power of the third eye. Aside from that, I forgot to pick up my prescription from the pharmacy. That shows how interested I am in modern medicine. Ha ha. As my spirit elevates, I am able to hold down more food. I was able to take in two smoothies today without having a tummy ache. The first smoothie was orange, apple, mango, and banana. The second was apple, banana, strawberry, blackberry, and raspberry.


For dinner, I made a chickpea and mushroom soup. It turned out surprisingly delicious and it was my first time trying it. I was tempted to buy some smoked turkey to put in it for flavoring when I was at the store but I decided against it. I said I was going to stay on track this time. And I'm glad that I did.

1 comment:

  1. Wow!!!! Thank God you didn't fall for that situation. I was almost as anxious reading this as I was with the KFC chicken calling your name from the fridge...lol. On a serious note do you wear glasses? I ask because I do. My eyesight was horrible, but since I have been doing the alkaline-Sebi diet; my vision has imporved. I thought it was a mind thing at first, but I really am seeing better. TTYL

    FLJ

    ReplyDelete