Monday, February 29, 2016

Day 100 - Saturday, February 27, 2016

"I believe in the impossible. I've overcome every obstacle."
-Fantasia Barrino

Today is going to be a difficult day. Well, so I thought. My brother who lives in the same city agreed to help me out with my son today while I go to a show with my other brother. We took my son to his photo shoot together which turned out really great and allowed for us to have a chance to bond together. That is very rare between this brother and I. He also played basketball with my son for a while before I went back home. 

Once, my brother dropped me home, he rushed my son to his Olympic karate training and I went shopping to find something to wear to the show. If you guys have been following my blog you should already know that I hate shopping. So, I just walked through every store, only looking at what was on the mannequins, until I saw something I liked. I purchased the outfit, along with a few accessories and rushed home to get ready.

I met up with my brother and his friends and we headed out to the show. This was a new experience for me. I really do not like to go out unless it is in nature or outdoors for the most part. But I had a good time because I was with my brother and we were surrounded by tons of our (Jamaican) culture. If I would have known children were allowed, I would have definitely brought my son. That bothered me a lot. I love my son and always feel lost without him. I can't remember the last time I asked someone to watch him and in eight years I can count on one hand how many times that has been done.

My evening picked up when they played a Lauryn Hill song at the show. You guys already know Lauryn Hill is my idol.

Once my brother told me what time he'd be dropping my son back home, I just dropped everything and left the show. I love my son dearly and he is my number one priority, not having a good time. Not to mention I missed him deeply and felt guilty for not bringing him. I purchased something from the show to bring home to him and left. I knew there would be an issue. That's why I chose to drive my own car. I believe in independence. It's better safe than sorry. I didn't want to be the reason the others had to leave the show early, or the reason I was late getting back to my young king.

As soon as I walked out to my brother's car to greet my little man, I opened the door and he exhaled with his hand on his chest. Then he said, "Mommy, are you alright? I could feel you worrying about me. I kept feeling pain in my chest every time you worried about me, right over my hear." 

I smiled and yanked him out of the car and held him in my arms as my heart melted. My son and I have a very strong super-human connection. We do feel each other when we are apart. I am glad I breastfed. As I held him my brother told me that he kept asking about me and that he was worried. I am blessed and honored to have such a close relationship with such a loving son.

As soon as my brother left, we went to the store to get snacks and I decided to have a movie night with my little one. We watched Fuller House on Netflix. I was so tired that I fell asleep on the couch after watching just one episode. I hope I don't get sick because it was very cold at the show and it rained on and off. I am just happy to be back with my Cuddle Bug.

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